Birthtalk.Making peace with your birth experience

Kelly talks about her experience:

I was feeling really confused – I was besotted with my beautiful baby but I also felt so much anger. Anger that I just didn’t feel ‘right’, emotionally I felt shocked and distressed about how the labour and birth went, and physically I was shocked and devastated about the wounds to my body. Birth wasn’t supposed to feel like this.

“In this photo (above) I was feeling really confused – I was besotted with my beautiful baby but I also felt so much anger. Anger that I just didn’t feel ‘right’, emotionally I felt shocked and distressed about how the labour and birth went, and physically I was shocked and devastated about the wounds to my body. Birth wasn’t supposed to feel like this.

[Birthtalk] helped me to debrief many times and would just give me little bits of info to chew over, and huge amounts of validation so that I could finally voice what was in my heart – that that birth experience had been traumatic and scary and not how birth should be. When the penny dropped that birth didn’t have to be like that, I felt reborn!! And so began the next part of my journey – to healing. ”

Kelly went on to heal from her birth, and then to have a much better experience the next time around.

At Birthtalk we know that BIRTH MATTERS ...

Making peace

It IS possible to make peace with your birth, and gain clarity about your experience. You don't always have to feel that emptiness, or such an intensity of emotions, about "what happened" when your little one arrived.

Initially, many women find it helpful to:
1. talk to people who know that BIRTH MATTERS & receive validation for how they are feeling
2. hear other women’s experiences & realise they ARE NOT ALONE
realise that birth CAN be different, it is SUPPOSED to be different, and there are valid reasons for their confusion, sadness and behaviour

This is why we formed our Healing From Birth support group
Can’t get to a meeting? See our Tips for Healing

Want a Better Birth next time?
Regardless of how your birth unfolds next time, there are many ways to work towards a better birth.

It is NOT about trying to control the actual event of childbirth.
It is NOT about whether you have gas or pethidine, or a waterbirth or a caesarean.
It IS about walking away from your birth feeling strong, positive, and confident.
It IS about knowing WHAT THINGS ARE IMPORTANT IN BIRTH for you to feel good about it and gain from it, and HOW TO GET THEM.

A Better Birth means feeling part of the decision-making, which is the KEY FACTOR many women report made their birth a positive event...REGARDLESS of how the birth unfolded.

Our Path to a better birth course and VBAC course provide vital info about what women need to know to plan a Better Birth. If you can’t get to a session, check out our information and suggested reading about planning a positive birth.

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